1. ratchet & socket set
2. drill
3. 1” drill bit (for hole in 2” x 6”)
4. metal drill bit (for hole in tub)
5. drill bit (for hole in tool stick)
6. 1” chisel
7. hammer
8. clamps
9. razor knife
10. saw (hand or electric)
11. any type of string
12. tools for tuning key
13. measuring tape
14. pencil
15. protective eye wear

1. a 15 gallon galvanized steel tub
2. a 1 1/8th” wooden garden tool stick
3. 4 2” L-shaped brackets (8 wood screws if not included with brackets)
4. 2” x 6” piece of wood (about 25” in length)
5. small wooden shims
6. rubber door stop
7. rubber plug
8. 8 hex bolts + 8 nuts
9. 16 metal washers (diameter must cover rubber o-rings when cinched down)
10. 16 rubber o-rings (for hex bolts)
11. 4 rubber o-rings (as a spacer between L-bracket and washtub)
12. 1 rubber grommet (for the hole in the washtub)
13. bass tuning key (find one with a narrow plate for attaching to the garden tool stick)
14. bass string (I used a D string)
15. hose clamp

Ingredients: Comments & Tips

The Hipshot HB2 Bass Tuning Machine, which I purchased on Amazon, has a backplate that is wider than the diameter of the wooden garden tool stick. As such, I had to jimmy-rig the tuning key to the garden tool stick. Looking on Amazon now, I can see a couple of tuning keys with a narrower back plate, which would work much better. Also, the rubber plug shown here could easily be replaced with a small rubber ball or rubber stopper. Just check that whatever you use sits comfortably in the cup of the door stop (turn over the door stop to see the cup).

These are the different rubber o-rings and washers I used. The three small o-rings (bottom right) were used as spacers between the shims and the washtub. The large-diameter o-rings above them were not used; they were too big. I recommend using 16 of the o-rings in the top row (1/2” in diameter & about 1/8” thick). The rubber washers on the bottom left were used with the bass string and door stop. They are flat on one side and tapered on the other.

 
 

If you enjoy counting, you will notice that this picture does not have all the hex bolts & nuts needed for the project, and there are far too many wood screws–eight too many if you are still counting. Due to poor planning on my part, two types of washers were used on the finished washtub. The first set of washers I bought did not have a sufficient diameter to cover the rubber o-rings when cinched down to the L-bracket. So, back I went to the hardware store to get washers with a wider diameter. I used the original washers as well because the head of the hex bolt was too small compared to the bigger washers.

I. Preparing The Tub

II. Attaching the 4”x6” to the Tub

III. Drilling a Hole in the 4”x6”

IV. Installing the Tuner

V. Plug the String & Put it All Together

This first step is nice ‘n easy. We’ll prepare the tub by drilling a hole for the string.

I.1 Remove Handles

If you have all your ingredients and tools close by, let’s begin with the tub. The first step is to remove the handles. I found that these rattled when left on the finished bass, so I pulled them off. Originally, I tired cutting them off, which was a lot of effort for little return. After wresting with one handle, I discovered that I could stretch out the handle and pull it out of the holes that hold it in place. I used a broom stick to stretch the handles by moving the stick back and forth while lodged in the handle at an angle.

I.2 Drill Hole for String

To locate the center of the bass, first find the total diameter of the bottom of the tub. My 15 gallon tub has a diameter of 19 inches. Use the measuring tape to find this length. Hold the measuring tape against the rim of the base of the tub, and with the other side of the measuring tape, move along the rim of the tub’s circumference until you find the greatest distance. That number is your diameter. Divide the diameter in half and you will locate the center point on the tub.

So, half of 19 is 9.5, so I put a mark on the tub at 9.5 inches. To ensure that I was accurate with my placement, I took another measurement 90 degrees from the first, and marked 9.5 inches again. Now you have an “X” to mark your drill spot. You can vaguely see my pencil marks in the picture bellow.

I.3 Install the Rubber Gasket

I was worried that the bass string would rub up against the metal hole, get cut, and break. So, I added a rubber gasket to the hole to protect the string.

I had to widen my hole to fit the larger gasket that I purchased. I didn’t have a larger metal drill bit, so I just used the drill bit to work around the hole and widen it until the rubber gasket fit. But now after playing the bass for a week, I am starting to see this gasket pull out from the tension in the string. I might need to get a larger gasket to fit the hole.

A step up in difficulty: we’ll attach the L-brackets to the tub in order to attach the plank of wood. BTW, you’re doing a great job.

II.1 Size your 4”x6”

Place the 4”x6” on the tub so that the edge of the wood is right up to the hole that you drilled. A half inch from hole to edge of wood should be fine. I marked this position on the washtub with a pencil so that I could remove the wood without worrying about losing the position.

The wood should hang off both sides of the washtub about 3 inches. Basically, you want enough overhang to attach the L-brackets. I recommend sizing the wood by holding the L-bracket in place, flush against the wood, and making your measurement.

Now, you are ready to hack up the wood. Any manner of saw is fine here, but make sure you have protective eye wear. Also, most hardware stores will cut wood for you, so if you make the measurement at the store when purchasing the wood, L-brackets, and tub, you can save yourself a little time and effort.

II.2 Scribe your 4”x6”

With the wood cut to the correct length, I marked a line on the wood — as you can see in the image above — so that I could quickly and accurately line up the wood with the wash tub after inevitably knocking the tub or wood while working. I also marked a line on the rim of the tub to line up with the wood. This will also be useful for upcoming steps.

II.3 Mark Drill Holes & Drill

Now with the wood in place, hold the L-brackets flush against the wood and color in the screw holes on the tub (you can see the blue dots I made in the picture above). At this point, you will notice that the 90 degree elbow of the bracket does not align very nicely with the angled tub. As such, there was a pretty decent half inch gap between the tub and the L-bracket. For now, color in the holes the best you can even though the L-bracket isn’t flush; we’ll deal with the gap in the next step.

With eight dots on your tub, you are ready to drill the holes. Make sure that the diameter of the hole you drill is large enough for your hex bolts to easily pass through. Don’t make the hole so small that you have to thread the bolt through the hole; you are looking for a little bit larger than the diameter of the bolt.

II.4 Make Wood Spacers for the L-Brackets

To deal with the gap between the L-bracket and the washtub, you could try and bend the L-bracket with a vice, a set of pliers, and a man with huge forearms. This might actually be an easier solution for some. But, fret not if you don’t have these things.

I, instead, used the shims to fashion little spacers for the L-bracket. Notice in the image above the very advanced measuring system implemented for this task. ;) You will need two shims for each L-bracket; one cut to the full length of the L-bracket, and the second, cut to about two-thirds the length.

Once the shims are cut, mark screw holes with the L-bracket. To drill these holes, put the spacers on a piece of wood you don’t care about, and drill through the spacer, into this scrap wood. Clamp the spacer to the scrap wood instead of trying to hold onto the spacer with your hand. Trust me, that will end badly.

Super important: set your drill to the lowest setting, or use it very tenderly to drill through the spacers. I did crack one of the spacers during this process and had to make a new one. Be slow and tender when drilling the holes and you won’t have to remake a spacer.

II.5 Attach the L-Brackets to the Tub

With all the spacers made, you are ready to install the L-brackets. I used two washers for each bolt, and a rubber o-ring between the washers and the L-bracket. Also, an additional o-ring is used as a spacer between the wood spacer and the tub at the bottom of the L-bracket. Using an o-ring here made up for any errors I committed in making of the spacers. Consult the pictures for further clarity.

This is a look inside the tub. In the final configuration, I used only two washers, even though there are three washers in the picture. More importantly, the rubber o-rings between the washer and the tub help to eliminate any possible rattling.

II.6 Attach the 4”x6” to the L-Brackets

After installing all four L-brackets, use the wood screws to attach the 4”x6” to the L-brackets. I placed the piece of wood on the ground, put the tub on top, lined up the rim of the tub with the lines I scribed on the 4”x6” (in step II.2), and screwed the L-brackets into the wood. Bam!

How are you doing? You’ve finished one of the major hurdles. Now it’s time to put a hole in the plank of wood to wedge the garden stick into.

III.1 Attach the String to the Stick

In order to get a sense of where I wanted the stick to be, to make sure that the string wasn’t going to be too far from the stick, making it hard to play, I used a cotton string to line up the garden stick on the 4”x6”. I tied off one end of the string a small stick, threaded the other end of the string through the hole in the tub, and attached it to one end of the garden stick. This allowed me to experiment with distances and decide on one I liked. See the orange string in the picture above?

III.2 Drill the Hole

Once I marked where the hole would be (4 1/4” for me), I unscrewed the 4”x6” from the tub, and placed it between two chairs. The garden tool stick that I purchased is 1 1/8” in diameter, so I used a 1” drill bit for the hole. A slightly smaller bit would probably have worked as well. Have a friend help you hold the wood will you drill your hole, or use the clamps to secure it down.

I ended up drilling a hole completely through the plank of wood. You may not have to do this on yours. It really depends on the garden stick you buy. Mine was tapered at the end, and so more of the garden stick needed to be pushed into the hole to create enough contact with the wood in order to keep it in place. Test how the stick fits in the hole. Start with a shallow depth and drill as deep as necessary to keep the stick secured in the hole.

With the hole drilled, attach the wood to the tub, and we are ready to move on to the tuning key!

Congratulations on your progress! You are nearing the the finish line with one last major hurdle. Time to install the tuning key on the garden stick tool. The process I describe here is not the only way to do this. I am sure you could use a table saw or a router for a cleaner cut, but I don’t have those awesome things.

IV.1 Secure the Stick

In the picture, you can see how I secured the stick. You may have big enough clamps to secure the stick directly to a stable surface. The clamps I have were too small so I used a combination of the clamps on the side and rags wrapped around the stick. This protected the stick and helped secure it in place. The other end of the stick is wrapped in a rag and pushed against a wall to prevent it from sliding around.

IV.2 Scribe the Stick

In this picture, you can see the complex process used for scribing the garden tool stick. ;) You will need to determine how deep to make the cut into the garden stick based on the length of the shaft on the tuning key as well as the amount of area needed for screwing the tuning key down. The tuning key is positioned near that top of the stick, about 2” or 3” from the the top.

After approximating how much space I would need and how deep to cut into the stick, I used a straight edge to connect the dots. Before cutting the stick, this is what it looked like.

IV.3 Score the Stick & Chisel

This step requires a saw. You will be making two cuts on the shaft of the stick. I used a Sawzall for this step (with a friend holding the stick in place). A hand saw would be sufficient as well. Make two cuts on both sides of where the tuning key will mount (see picture above). Cut to determined depth, and then go get your chisel.

With the chisel and hammer, you will slowly start to remove wood between the two cuts that you made. Don’t rush through this step. Don’t try to take the wood out in big hunks. Take your time. Relax and slowly whittle down the stick to the line that you scribed on the side. Use a little sandpaper to clean up your expert chisel work, and now you are ready to drill a hole for the shaft of the tuning key.

IV.4 Drill a Hole for the Tuning Key

From the picture, you can see how I scribed the stick before drilling the hole. Again, I determined how the tuning key would be affixed to the stick, and made a mark for drilling the hole. To drill the hole, use a drill bit that is of sufficient diameter for the shaft of the tuning key. I actually brought the tuning key to the hardware store to make sure I purchased an appropriate drill bit.

When drilling the hole, the drill bit burst through the back side of the stick and ripped up some large splinters. It was kind of a mess, so I used the chisel and some sandpaper to clean up the hole a little bit.

IV.5 Attach the Tuning Key

To attach the tuning key, follow any specific instructions that come with your tuning key. I only could use two screws to attach my tuning key. But this was due to poor planning on buying a tuning key.

Here is the final installation of my tuning key. You can see what I mean by jerry-rigged now. Because of my poor planning when purchasing the tuning key, and ordering it off of Amazon, I had to attach it at an angle with only two screws. This definitely works and serves its purpose. But, know that there is a cleaner solution. Also, getting a smaller tuning key will allow you to cut less wood out of the stick.

You are basically done!! Been quite a journey. I am sure things didn’t go exactly as planned, but when do they. The fun part is when things don’t go as planned. It’s like that saying, “The adventure doesn’t begin until something goes wrong.”

V.1 Drill a Hole in the Door Stop

Alright, pull that drill out one last time, and drill a hole in your door stop and in your plug. Make sure to use your scrap piece of wood underneath the door stop. You don’t want to put a hole in your deck. I used the same drill bit I used for drilling the hole in the washtub.

V.2 Set up the Bass String

From the picture, you can see the rubber o-rings and washers I used. I removed the the last o-ring at the bottom of the picture because it didn’t jive well with the rubber grommet in the washtub.

V.3 Set up the Garden Tool Stick

You need to wedge the stick into the hole with some force. Twisting motions work best. Make sure that you line up your tuning key with the hole in the tub. Also, remember to put the hose clamp on the stick before wedging it into the hole. The hose clamp should be tight enough to keep the sting in place, but lose enough for the string to move when being tuned. Once the stick is wedged into the hole (it may wiggle a tad, which is ok, but only a tad), you are ready to string up the bass.

V.4 String Your Brand New Washtub Bass

Stringing the bass is as simple as it sounds. Nothing left to do here, but thread the string through the hole in the tub, run it up under the hose clamp, and wrapped it around the tuning key. BAM!!!! You are done. Also, you may want to wedge some shims under the 4”x6” to ensure that it doesn’t wiggle around.

Tune the string started plucking. Experiment with playing it on carpets, rugs, and wood floors. Also, you can get different tones if the washtub is propped up on something, allowing sound to escape from the bottom. So, now you get to find what works best for you. Lastly, to make the bass more accessible for all people, I used a tuner to locate notes, and marked them as fret lines on the stick.

Awesome! Congratulations! Now that you have your washtub, its time to learn how to play it. My only tip is start plucking away. I don’t play bass, so that is what I am doing. This was the result of playing my washtub for the first time with reckless abandon. Here’s to playing with reckless abandon!

I hope that you found these instructions informative. If you have any questions, or suggestions for ways to improve these instructions — make things more clear, more efficient — don’t hesitate to leave a comment. Or, better yet, leave a comment about how much you are enjoying your washtub bass. Happy Music Making!

After a period of working individually on projects, Sean and I are back together re-designing the site that launched our partnership–Eastwood Development Inc. I can’t tell you how much we have learned since that first project. What a huge learning experience it was–the all night hack sessions, and the bumbling through solutions to problems while creating three more problems along the way. But with a decent amount of websites under our belts, we are moving through this project in style. Our work flow is sweet. We have a clear understanding about the stages of the project, found a simple, but extremely useful way for dealing with assets for the site. The stress is low and the stoke is high.

This is a sneak peek at one of the early designs. We are excited about this one.

Cheers!

VI

From a distance nothing seemed to change. A man walking along the meadow would’ve heard the stream and smiled at the lovely day. The stranger would’ve thought nothing of seeing a young woman running across the meadow, the wind in her long hair, and a wide smile brushed across her face. The man would’ve thought she must be enjoying this day as much as me. He would’ve been right. But no one was there to see Abbey running from the meadow.

Her steps took her back along the path that she had walked many years ago, but the path was worn and gutted. The path had changed. Abbey had changed. The forest had changed. Regret did not find a foothold in these thoughts. Rather, Abbey still could breathe in life and she was comforted by that idea. She had forgotten that she could run, but loved every racing step she took forward. She forgot what it felt to have wind in her face and aching joints.

She was not the same woman that she had been before and she rejoiced in knowing what she now knew. That shadow that resided in her mind was gone, and now she saw distinctly. Abbey ran the path to her house, up the porch steps, and through the front door to live her life again.

V

The house was the routine of Abbey’s life. Hallways from bedroom to bath and bath to kitchen formed the arc of her routine. Other rooms and places in the house became containers of the past – each room and cupboard a tomb no longer visited. Her mind fully gave over to the darkness and the darkness put everything in neat compartments. Abbey didn’t have to avoid these areas because they no longer appeared on her mental map of the house. Unopened doors were adornments on walls.

Today, being Thursday, was laundry day. Abbey carried her sheets and towels down the hall and through the kitchen. She opened the door to the laundry room and flipped on the light. The distinct pop of a light bulb accompanied the brief brightness and subsequent fade to darkness. Abbey’s pupils dilated, searching, focusing.

She started her wash in the dark.

Passing through the kitchen, she went to the closet in the hall for a new light bulb. Opening the door dislodged stacks of light bulbs, toilet paper, towels and boxes. The closet spilt its contents into the hall, and light bulbs shattered against the wood floor. Something glass in one of the boxes didn’t survive the tumult. Abbey surveyed the floor thoughtlessly. A general apathy pervade most of her day, and even though the mess interrupted her Thursday routine, she remained disinterested.

Abbey grabbed the broom out of the closet and began sweeping the glass into a neat pile. While sweeping, she knocked a large piece of glass down the hall. It bounced off the wall and traveled under a door. Abbey stared at the door. The glass was gone but the sound of it bouncing down a set of stairs rang clear in the silence of the house.

A burst of color blinded Abbey.

The long forgotten feeling of not knowing traveled through her spine and into her mind. Light expanded her capillaries and flowed from the nape of her neck to the creases between her toes. Abbey’s spine was forced straight as the harrowing idea collided with the darkness that had taken up residence in her mind.

Abbey fell to the floor and shook.

A warmth not felt in a long time washed down her arms and into her fingers as she lay there on the floor. The darkness residing in her mind lost part of its hold — an idea had taken hold of her. She didn’t know and had no control to know. Yet, this did not cause her any anxiety or fear. She no longer feared not knowing – all because of that door in the hall she long ago began to ignore.

Tears warmed her cheeks.

Lightness watered the dormant memories and allowed her to peer back to the beginning. With the lightness came remembrance of happiness. The beauty she had known in life – whimsical and full of the unknown. Joy pushed forward into the present dragging memories of laughter, and in this state she felt life – her life completely.

Looking up at the door she remembered her father – the door to the basement! Jumping to the door, she grabbed the handle and tried to open it.

Nothing.

She was emboldened and fearless. Invigorated by the desire to break it down and see what she did not know, she backed up and ran at the door. Her shoulder smashed the door, and she stumbled down the flight of stairs.

When Abbey rose to her feet, she saw what she could not have expected. The meadow stood in front of her and the darkness was there before her. The sun hung in the same place in the sky as it had hung the day she ventured out of the house. The lightness that pulsed through her veins forced her forward, towards the darkness that had clouded so many years. Abbey in an instance gained such a profound perspective on her life that she no longer doubted her actions.

Abbey ran across the field. The grass whipped and cut her legs and sweat fell from her nose. Abbey’s lungs burned and ached from the crisp forest air, but she never slowed her pace. She moved faster and faster across the field at the unknown. The distance between her and the shadow quickly diminished until she ran with her head lowered directly into the dark cloud.

————————–

Part VI

With painted faces, sequins, masks, leggings and cardboard, SFIE hosted its annual Halloween Party. The all-school event was a blast this year. I was sick with the swine flu last year and missed out on the festivities. But not this year! No sir! I stood witness to the amazing costumes made by students, the excellently choreographed dance routines of the classes, and an array of remarkable talents for the talent show.

From SFIE Halloween

Each class started the day getting costumes on, trick-or-treating from classroom-to-classroom, and practicing class performances one more time before the big show.

From SFIE Halloween

The excitement was palpable!

From SFIE Halloween

All the teachers put out a lot of effort to decorate the classes. It was amazing! I know that it is an adult language school, but throw some decorations on the wall and have people dress up in costumes and everyone is a kid again for the afternoon.

From SFIE Halloween

Mario was in full host mode!

From SFIE Halloween

Cathy had the perfect Cruela Devil costume.

From SFIE Halloween

And Keith, how could he have chosen a better costume? He couldn’t have! A picture perfect Dwight Schrute.

From SFIE Halloween

Some students sat in fear of what the rest of the day would hold.

From SFIE Halloween

While others were mostly exuberant.

From SFIE Halloween

Now the stage is being set for the class performances and the talent show. Everyone gathered on the 4th floor in anticipation.

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

Even those not in costume enjoyed themselves. I think these three were wishing they had a costume, though.

From SFIE Halloween

The Lady Gaga Crew was in full force.

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

I was superbly impressed with the talents of the students.

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

The black light artist!

From SFIE Halloween

Honestly, these pictures suck! But the art was amazing. They were painted on acrylic, glowed in a black light and were also 3D! Yea … that’s right … 3D!

From SFIE Halloween

Everyone was enjoying the performances.

From SFIE Halloween

With the excitement level turned up to the max!

From SFIE Halloween

These two had the crowd in the palm of their hands.

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

As you can see from the transfixed faces.

From SFIE Halloween

The King himself was in attendance to preside over the performances.

From SFIE Halloween

Don’t fear the fangs. Fause wouldn’t harm an ant.

From SFIE Halloween

Taryn was out master of ceremonies and was superb! She kept the party rolling right into class performances and the costume contest.

From SFIE Halloween

With a free month of tuition as the first place prize, all the students lined up to show off what they had put together.

From SFIE Halloween

The ghostbuster won 2nd place and Bill Clinton next to her took 1st place.

From SFIE Halloween

Perhaps my favorite costume. The Brazilian dressed up as a Green Card!

From SFIE Halloween

Everyone else is impressed.

From SFIE Halloween

And Dracula in 3rd place!

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

The teachers even showed off there stuff!

From SFIE Halloween

So if you have stuck through this post of pictures, you have arrived at the best part of the day. A student for her talent brought in a blank canvas. Painted it while the day went by and at the end she had this painting for the school. The coolest part is she let all the students come up and put there mark on the artwork with paint and finger. Yes! She won the talent contest! Obviously…

From SFIE Halloween

From SFIE Halloween

And the artist!

From SFIE Halloween

The last activity of the day was a scavenger hunt through the neighborhood. I realized after making the list of activities that some of the questions might have been too difficult for our beginning class. But, they all jumped right in. Here’s the winning team who finished the scavenger hunt in like 5 minutes. It was absurd how fast they completed everything. Don’t they look like winners?

From SFIE Halloween

Well, it was a day for the books! A great one! See you next Halloween.

From SFIE Halloween

With a beautiful fall day in SF, I decided today was the day to get back on the bike. I grabbed a rag and some bike oil and headed down to the basement where all the bikes hang from the ceiling. I wiped down the bike with the dry rag and rubbed some of the grease off the chain and derailleur. The chain was still off the gears from the crash. I pulled my blue 12-speed Trek down from the ceiling and moved it over to the bike stand. As I tested the gears, I applied a little amount of oil to the chain and pedaled with my hand. I wasn’t sure how damaged the bike would be from the crash. I never closely examined it afterward. But, everything worked. The wheels were relatively true. The gears worked. The tires needed a little air, and that’s it.

I climbed out of the basement and pointed my wheels to Mike’s Bike to replace my broken helmet. What a feeling to be riding again! My house is on a hill so I immediately started downhill. The wind whipped my eyes and I coasted down the hill. I let out a little laugh. I missed this…

It feels nice to be back. My blog even told me as much. WordPress has quotes that show up in your admin console, and the quote that appeared was as follows: “It’s nice to have you back where you belong.” How’s about that!

There is no insurance against falling off your bike – not cycling through SF with a huge backpack, not riding north across the Golden Gate Bridge to Stinson Beach or Point Reyes, and certainly not towing a trailer 450 miles to San Diego. I found this out last Monday.

I biked over to Danch’s for an evening chill with the dudes. I arrived to find Papa Danch and Stepmom Danch already hanging out. Eric, the class act that he is, wined and dined us for the evening as the dudes arrived. Sean came from his first day at Pixar. No one knows where Millican came from. And Mikey came from soccer practice or his kickboxing class … I can’t keep up with his “arduous athletic routine.”

Photo by SeanPlusPlus

We all departed, and I jumped in the saddle, clipped in and headed west into the fog. You know that stat … all accidents happen a mile from home … or maybe it’s half a mile … well … sure enough, I wrecked 4 blocks from my house. I was jamming down a decent hill in Golden Gate Park – cars as sparse as street lights. I’ve ridden this hill hundreds times … I’ve ridden down this hill no-handsies singing at the top of my lungs!

Without my proper bike lights in the fog and darkness, and after a couple glasses of wine, I banked too sharp on the last turn before 30th Ave. My front wheel collided with the curb. I sailed over my handle bars into dirt and grass spinning and rolling. I came to a rest on my back looking up into the trees. Something was definitely hurt but I couldn’t pinpoint where. I lifted my right arm. Fine. Left arm … AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Photo by Mikey

I pulled my body and bike off the ground. With a shot of adrenaline, I walked the last 4 blocks home knowing my left shoulder was messed up. Dislocated? Broken collar bone? I assumed the worse.

I got to the casa and collapsed into the arms of Sean and Mikey. My face went white and then green and then white according to JR. I poured sweat and started shivering.

Photo by Mikey

Mikey made the quick decision to go to the hospital. After an hour at St. Mary’s Medical Center, I was out the door with a grade II AC separation in my left shoulder. The AC ligament connects the clavicle to the scapula. My arm will be in a sling for 10 days, and Dr. Newell says that the rehab will take 4 – 8 weeks. I should have full recove…

Wait … I am going to step back from this for a moment … although I am injured and it sucks … I have a lot to be thankful for. My body could be more severely injured. I have awesome friends who have totally helped me out … I am sitting here with three of them right now – Danch, Siegel and SMS. If that isn’t enough perspective on the situation, an Iranian student at SFIE said he felt bad about my shoulder. To show his sympathy, he told me about being shot in the Iran-Iraq war and the long healing process. So … yea … things are allllright!

I am on the mend, loving one-handed showering, and looking forward to shoulder rehab. I’ll be back on the bike at the beginning of October.

Now, the last sushi meal at our favorite place before we move.

IV

The sun rose and set many times before Abbey left her bed. When she did begin to leave, it was only for a short time and always aimed at a specific purpose. She would resolve to eat and so she would go to the kitchen and eat. She would resolve to bathe and so she would go to the bath and bathe. She would resolve to sleep and so she would stay in bed and sleep. The bed became a staging ground – nothing was attempted out of bed without long deliberations in bed – and every outing ended where it began.

The darkness glacially permeated Abbey’s mind. Initially, Abbey could identify her thoughts, but time wore away any difference, and the darkness and her mind became one. Since the arrival of the new resident, Abbey forgot about her father’s workshop in the basement and the piney smell of sawdust. The TV became another piece of furniture – not something her mother watched at predictable times. Before she would look into the woods and down the path reflecting on that day, but now she didn’t even look out the windows. Every step and stare was infused with meaning, not from the past, but from the darkness.

The routine, although comforting and safe, was a painful drain on Abbey’s soul and her body wore the effects. The skin around her cheeks was taunt and leathery and her eyes slowly sunk into a dark well. Her hair grayed. Skin and muscle hung from bone. Her breasts hung low. The light dimmed in her eyes. But, these changes were so imperceptible day to day that Abbey took it all with the rising and setting of the sun. And, although Abbey believed she had arrived at a station in life that she had full control over, this too was not true. There was so much that Abbey would never control.

All these changes she held on her shoulders as part of her choice, as part of her resolve to take control. Time and distance contorted her thoughts, and the darkness allowed her the deception of control. Time and distance erased the memories of a past. Time and distance told Abbey, “This is the life you chose.”

A grand lie, indeed! Couldn’t Abbey remember that this life was not of her making? She only tried to control her life after the darkness entered her mind, not before. But, this fact too was lost in the web of darkness that lived in Abbey’s mind.

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Part V

III

Awakened by the familiar sounds of her room, Abbey looked out her window from her bed. She wiped the sleep from her eyes and threw off the covers. Sitting up in her bed, she inspected the walls and the floor. Everything was the same. The path in the forest was gone, and the Redwood and Cyprus stood upright and tall outside her window. She got out of bed and went to the kitchen.

There was no sign of her parents. Her mother was not watching TV in the kitchen and her father was not eating the breakfast her mother had prepared. She walked to their room and it was clean and neat. The bed was made. No one had slept in that bed the night before.

She went back to the kitchen and poured a glass of water. She drank the entire glass and then filled it again. Abbey took her water outside and sat on the steps of her porch.

A shadow obscured the questions racing through Abbey’s mind: Where is my family? What happened yesterday? I walked through the woods on a beautiful day. I was happy and carefree. I had not chosen my path with great care, but no one would say that I had chosen my path carelessly. How did I get back to my house? Did I leave?

Abbey futilely attempted to make sense of the previous day — as if an understanding would change the mysterious position she found herself in. The funny medication of rationalizing — always after the fact and always a justification, yet never a cure. The actions already committed; the reasons plentiful and contradictory.

She thought intensely all morning about the path she had taken the day before. So many questions could not be answered and so many events could not be remembered. No matter how hard she thought, she could not find the crux of this change — this entirely new life. Each step she had taken in many directions was now, in retrospect, just one step in one direction. Realizing that she had arrived somewhere in her life that she had not consciously chosen scared her even more. The muscles in here neck tightened and her legs shook with tension. Quickly, she ran into the house, slammed the door, dashed to her room, and leaped under her covers.

Abbey resolved to do nothing until she could understand how she arrived in her bed from the night before. Decisions are dangerous if not well thought out, and Abbey resolved to make no decision without careful planning.

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Part IV